The Forks Eloped With The Socks!


What a shock. Have you heard?
This elopement is so absurd.
The forks declared their undying love
To the socks who lived above.
Eating veggies with a spoon is lame
As my ill-clad feet hide in shame.

I wouldn’t have minded a few forks and pairs of socks going astray.

But ALL* of them.

Who has ever heard of missing forks?

Spoons, knives, and those treacherous socks – YES.

But the forks?
They are normally so well behaved.

I finally decided to do something about the fork situation.

Tonight I found 8 (mismatched) silvery forks with shiny tines

and a purple swirled mug for $1.25 at the thrift store.

I’m still waiting for the socks to come home.

I know.

I’m an optimist.



* Okay. Not all of them. Out of a service of 12 forks, I can only find 4.

Out of all my socks, maybe two have sole mates.


Can anybody relate? Anybody?


About susan2009

I am a 58 year old female who just finished her BA in Theology/Christian Leadership. I was on the 30 year plan. I finally graduated seminary (2009)! . . . . I have two marvelous adult children that I am very proud of. . . . I have the extreme privilege of attending and working for the best church in No. CA. . . . I became a Christian 3 days before my 16th birthday. 35 years later I'm still growing. . . . AND . . . I'm going on a "God hunt;" will you join me? After all, how can I resist the One who calls ME daughter?

8 responses »

  1. LOL! I can definitely relate to both. With 4 sons, I have a huge pile of unmatched socks. *smile*

    Thanks for stopping by and visiting! God bless. Dani

  2. Oh my GOSH…. I thought the sock monster only lived in my dryer !! I get to a point that all the
    “SINGLE” socks go in a small basket by the dryer and I have a match maker, match maker party. Those that don’t find dates have to be donated or tossed or turned into hand puppets, dust rags, or whatever but I have found that they try to take over my life @#!@#$#%$ Argh…. At my house out of a service for 16 I have 5 teaspoons. I think they went on an adventure with the forks. {Probably looking for a side of beef).

  3. Duker – you are so funny.

    I like the idea of having a basket right by the dryer to keep the singles until their ultimate fate can be determined.

    I think I’ll go look for a “side of beef” as i haven’t eaten yet. Been too busy catching up with things.

  4. Apparently forks take off on their own all over the world. I’ve had to replenish my fork drawer a couple of times. I wonder where they go? Is there an annual meeting in a forest somewhere in the Amazon where all the missing forks go for a once in a lifetime party? Will archeologists one day in the distant future dig up ancient garbage dumps and wonder why the world of this time worshipped forks and sacrificed them regularly? Maybe the forks you bought at your thrift store were my forks looking for a new and better life in America?

    Questions, questions! But … where DID my forks go?? And why?? Maybe we need to call the X-Files.

  5. Ahhh Columbine, those are the eternal questions, aren’t they? I’m glad to hear that I’m not the only one with missing forks. 🙂

    As an aside, I used to really like the x-files. It would be cool if our fork mystery were an episode in some x-file remake.

    And of course we could “play” ourselves. Or if I couldn’t be me, I’d like Meg Ryan to be me because sometimes I’d like to be her. At least the Meg I perceive.

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